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In Love, Life and Motherhood

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Ready to find Clarity, Closure, and Courage in your life?

Jump start your heart by joining the 30-Days of Yes Challenge!

What if right now in this moment, you could start living THE BEST 30 DAYS OF YOUR LIFE?

This isn’t some hokey hypothetical here. I’m serious, what if right now you had everything you needed to be your HAPPIEST, HEALTHIEST, SEXIEST self? If you had…

More Confidence

Unlimited Time

Total
Financial Freedom

…what in the heck would you do with your fabulous self?

Three years ago, you would have found me hunkered down in the corner of my bathroom praying for a magic pill, a Genie, anything that could clear the smoke of bitterness and confusion from my lungs. I couldn’t breathe, I was afraid to change, and I was also a mom who couldn’t afford to entirely lose her sh*t.

There is no such magic pill that grants you instant happiness.
There’s only one (maybe 2) questions that you must get butt-naked honest about:

What Secrets Are You Willing to Face to Start Breathing Again?

What story, thoughts, or relationships are you holding on to that are cutting off your air supply?

Again this is not a hypothetical. Regret, anger, resentment over not living the life you desire can and will eventually make you sick. Studies have shown that bitterness and stressful relationships can be as bad for your heart as a regular smoking habit.

In my practice, working with women on various issues from anxiety and depression, to work and marital stress, I have seen the physical complications that arise from what I call TOLERENZA.

In silence,
we tolerate:

  • The endless expectations of those around us
  • The heavy blows of our own self-criticism
  • Nights of passionless dutiful sex
  • Days of joyless parenting

We take one for the team. Save face. Endure. All the while suffering through migraines, sleep deprivation, indigestion and a host of other medical complications. Our bodies fire with signals that something’s wrong, yet we stay the course.

We do this damn well, but ever hear the saying: “That Which You Tolerate, You Teach?”

Pretty heavy right?

The 30-Days of Yes Challenge will help you put an end to chronic resentment and tolerenza in your life. You will reconnect with your mind, your body, and most importantly you will discover THE BEST OF YOU. You will learn to say YES to yourself and to the things that bring you happiness.

You don’t want to wait for the ultimate smack down to wake up like I did.

I was sleepwalking through motherhood. Constantly on edge. Irritable. Distracted by resentment and distrust in my marriage. I didn’t want to raise my kids like this and knew something had to change. One day I looked into the mirror and said, “I can’t go on like this.” But it wasn’t until I was sucker-punched by the complete unexpected that I took action.

I was seven months pregnant with a 2-year old at home when I discovered that my husband was in Spain having an affair with a younger woman. It was the final straw of years of passive existence. In the 30-Days of YES Challenge, I share my story and reveal the exact steps I followed to regain strength and move forward.

In the end, after losing everything, some pretty amazing blessings came my way. Like the day I nervously walked into the Cash for Gold shop to sell my wedding ring and walked out with a house.

I know what you might be thinking:

“Tamika, this is all good and well, but I can’t even get out of bed right now, how am I going to move through this?”

“What in the heck is wrong with me? Did I do something? Is this my fault?”

“What will my family think? How will this affect my kids? Am I just being ridiculous to think…?”

These are the same questions that flashed through my mind before I decided to put an end to Tolerenza in my life. I was scared sh*tless and doubted my every move. But I made it through, with a modicum of grace and dignity intact.

Over the years my friends have asked, “Tamika, how did you do it? How did you manage to make the transition so smoothly?”

Well, it was hardly a smooth transition. The truth, is I followed a very disciplined path and meditated on the collected stories and wisdom of other heroic women around me. I also wept…a lot. Then, most importantly, I took action.

And the crazy thing, is all of that had to happen in order for me to know how to help you. The 30-Day challenge is no magic pill, but it will certainly have you shouting “Holy Hell…this is exactly what I needed!”

So if you’re ready to transform your doubt and fear into a life filled with love, energy, and abundance then…Give YOUrself a chance!

When I found out my husband had an affair, my world came crumbling down and I felt terribly lost. I remember my 1st conversation with Tamika after the discovery and the perspective, comfort, and understanding she provided. She was calm and grounded in her approach but yet had firm resolve on her worth as a woman. I would definitely participate in this course dealing with infidelity, loss, and the making of a new life.

-Sara Lenhardt

Here’s what you’ll get:

30 Daily Practices for Mending a Broken Heart.

Before you can YES to things that are good and healthy in your life, you’ve got tend to that broken heart of yours. You’ve got to re-write your story.  You’ve got to move from being a mere character in a washed up story that no longer works for you to becoming the director!  I’m going to show you how to heal the pain and brokenness in your life so that you can say YES to more joy, love and prosperity.

2 Interviews with the Most Inspiring Women who Tell
Their Story of Going from Tolerance to Truth

Click Here for a Sneak Peak

Invitation to Join SML’s Private Facebook Community

where you can enjoy the benefits of receiving and supporting other moms.

You have encouraged me more than you’ll ever know. You have given me a way to reframe my outlook and perception on life, relationships, love and myself. To simply put it…You pursue your dreams. It sounds cliché but you’re not cliché. Many people go through life not pursing their dreams due to fear – fear of failure, fear of change, lack of patience which can fuel fear, and for some, they may actually fear success. The will and drive that you possess is admirable. It’s infectious and inspiring.
Candice Baker

Still Not Sure if it’s for you? IT IS…

  • If you have even the slightest inkling that something is off in your life…
  • If you want change but don’t know how to move from thought to action…
  • If you can answer the following question honestly with a YES…

Am I ready to settle down with happy?

Not talking about the one night stands with happy

The retail fixes, the serial dating, the overeating, or other forms of momentary relief. I’m talking about the happy that surprises you mid-day, tells you how beautiful you are, that makes your eyes smile and gives to you unconditionally, the kind that makes you radiant and illuminating to those around you.

This kind of happy goes unclaimed way too often, either because we feel undeserving of it or because we are unable to see it already in its full existence.

Are you Ready to Claim It?

I Hope So!

Now for the disclaimer. This challenge IS NOT FOR EVERYONE. In my practice, I’ve witnessed the powerful transformation that takes place in people’s lives when they begin to change old patterns of thinking and being.

It almost has NEVER WORKED with clients who want a quick fix, who want to be told exactly what to do, who aren’t ready to dig their hands into the process. Taking action involves risk, it means rocking the boat, and it means potential changes in your life that may not make the most logistical sense.

Some of you who might be in crisis mode at this very moment, ARE NOT quite ready for the change process, perhaps you’re still grieving and need every ounce of energy you can muster to simply show up for the day. I totally get that. Surround yourself with people who will love up on you, until you can love yourself again. Your body will tell when you’re ready to take action.

For those of you who feel ready and strong enough to take a step towards change, then…

jadah

There are a few people I meet who can make me feel so confident in what I’m doing in the world. Tamika is one of those people for me. As I was building my dream business, I struggled with confidence since I didn’t have a college degree or any fancy certifications. Tamika was able to gently guide me and highlight my strengths, so I could get over my self-doubts that we’re blocking me.

Jadah Sellner

simplegreensmoothies.com

megan-brown

As a Licensed Marriage Family Therapist and colleague of Tamika’s, I have witnessed firsthand her passion for helping people, especially women moving through issues of infidelity and divorce. Tamika provides a high quality level of support to all she comes in contact with and she is truly an inspirational and resilient woman.

Megan Brown, LMFT

walkandtalktherapist.com

Traci

Single Mama Lama is an outlet that encourages other women as they navigate through their own personal stories. Tamika helps women find the heart, mind, and courage to make profound decisions in their lives.

Traci Truetler

relaxspaandbeauty.com